Thursday, 26 March 2020

OVERSHARING, OVERCORRECTION AND OVERCOMPENSATION

Wait, what?!

When I showed him those private nessages, I inherently regreted in an instant. I was so determined to prove a point, like a lion looking for his dinner, that I divulge to him the must nots. Yet, the relationship remained more slime and sleaze than I could ever imagine. I started bombarding him with messages and calls with the aim of reestablishing a broken connection.  Speak of over compensation!

Over compensation is going to the gym and trying to lift a 100kg when you can only lift 50kg. Overcompensation is striving feverishly to fit in socially that you appear awkward. According to the merriam- webster dictionary,  over compensation is excessive reaction to a feeling of inferiority,  guilt or inadequacy leading to an exaggerated attempt to overcome the feeling. It can sometimes be counterproductive.


You are going to run into people who don't deserve to get to know you on a certain level.  Vulnerability needs to be earned and trust needs to be built.  In one of my posts, I talked of how you crush when you rush in friendship and basically relationships in general. Let your conversations and dealings with others be seasoned with moderation.  You don't have to share everything.

It is amazing how people can share so much about their lives online when in  real life they won't dare do that. Some showing evidence of their apparent best life, pda filled relationships, glamour filled fashion, fierce workouts, botched and seemingly perfect surgeries and misleading advertisement. A lot of it is just smoke and mirrors. It has created this phenomenon where people end up comparing the different chapters of their lives  with those of others, which is unhealthy.

Once an authoritative yet misogynistic teacher gave a female student 12 strong lashes that tore through the bare fleshy skin, because the student stepped  out to the hostel during class hours. He didn't even bother to find out the absolutely valid reason the student went out in the first place. Overcorrection can come in so many spectrums. It is trying so hard to make something right that you go overboard. For instance, when your previous wife doesn't want children and you marry another then have a gazilion babies that you cannot adequately take care of. No need for name calling here.

Be winning in real life and not just on social media; be present, be content, be respectful of  boundaries; be moderate and don't let the actions of others determine your character.  Like a Latin proverb says, too much of anything is bad. Eating is great for the body, however,  delightful over indulgence in even the favorites: chocolates,  donuts, wine, ecetera could lead to obesity. So why don't you evaluate the areas that you are literally going overboard.

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