NAVIGATING THE DEPTHS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE AND DEALING WITH THE VICISSITUDES DURING THIS PANDEMIC

Watching the 2015 animated film, Inside Out was like peering through the depths of emotional intelligence.  For centuries mankind has spared no efforts in finding out the various dimensions of this form of intelligence,  EQ.  The fact that Daniel Goleman's international bestseller 'Emotional Intelliegence' has sold over 5 million copies in 40 different languages proves just that.

gonewiththetwins

Inside out gave a paranomic view of the five core emotions ( Joy, Sadness, Fear,  Anger and Disgust) and how their interplay affects decisions and choices. A teachable lesson from the movie is that every emotion is important and that it is important to get comfortable even with the uncomfortable ones. I have spoken briefly about it in a previous post.  One of the most trying times is navigating emotions following a break-up. You feel all these emotions that are dreaded and yearn for a quick fix. However, it is when you harness and grow out of them, do you see real change. Ultimately, every emotion is "Energy in Motion".

In 1995, Daniel Goleman did propose that emotinal intelligent people have four fundamental capabilities of self- awaressness, self regulation, social awareness and social skils. But, what has really intrigued me about emotionally intelligent people is the fact that they can be very manipulative, yet hardly get manipulated.  Since we all need to know how to spot a user and overall, live in the blissful land of emotional intelligence,  here are 5 steps to achieving that.

Read people
Watch body language, observe and evaluate people's actions and reactions. One thing that most tend to overlook is the fact that reactions are data.

Learn the Fine Art of Communication
Emotionally intelligent people are able to communicate difficult feelings. They don't get irrationally mad with their partners, they say the hard truth in sincerity and love and don't create unnecessary drama. They are assertive and have a laudable ability to listen.

Look at things from a third person view point
Take yourself form the narrative and adress whatever issue you are dealing with as a third party. This detachment allows you to make decisions that are not clouded by emotions. Besides, being skeptical is a good thing. If something sounds to good to be true, then probably it is.

Predict Behaviour, Manage Expectations
The best predictor of future Behavior is past Behavior. Knowing how perosn is likely to act in situation x, y and z, you can better handle expectations. It is best to have low expectations of people; strive to give to yourself,  what you seek for from others, be it vallidation or approval.

Have a Positive Attitude
The key to having a positive attitude is cultivation of positive thoughts. Optimistic individuals do get negative thoughts,  but they quickly replace them with positive ones. Like it is wisely said, a thought precedes an emotion.

          While I am wondering how the heck people are making millions on tiktok during this pandemic, I am tempted to ponder on how others are dealing with the whirlwind collage of emotions. Indeed, this is no time to be hyper- emotional, it is a call for adaptation. It is also a subtle reminder to the 4A's of stress management: avoid,  alter, adapt or accept. De- stress, unwind and find ways of sparkling joy around; put on your fab playlist and have a little dance party. This too shall pass!

          As the sage Lucius Annaeus Seneca said, "If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you're needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person".

#Staypositive #Stayhome #Staysafe